Tell-Tale Heart

The Wind Waker Wind Temple, or Twilight Princess' Twilight Palace.

All right, for the Taint, I'm thinking of renaming it to something such as, "The effect," or "The (Name here) effect." Unless any issues arise with that? Update: It is now called the Ruination.

You did an epic job on that picture, Kusai! Especially on the hand and the flames C:

I drew Kusai's above character for a trade:

He's right, and the blade is also different in the Four Swords As well, the cloth is missing, and the engravings.

For Ashe again:

The torso piece is very impressive! And I do really like the face on the Colors one. You've really improved on your faces.

Ah, I'm beginning to see where your coming from, Spire. Forgive me for misunderstanding, and thanks for the support. I was having a bit of a bad day when I read your posts, so I may have been in the wrong mindset. I'm fine now, though. And I actually woke up this morning with a few ideas on how to retry this scene, and rewrite it. Whatever the case, I'm wanting to introduce this character, Ghadin, in perhaps only two pages or one if I can manage that. First of all, I could have him out in what I call The Paths (If I need to change that name, let me know), moving on his way. A military-type character I have would approach him and draw his sword (There are many "factions" in the Paths, and they don't get along, which is explained in the first chapter). Ghadin would then simply wave his claw over him, freezing him in place, and say something along the lines of, "You'll remain unable to move for only a few minutes. Let us hope that no one else arrives here in that time," to show the reader what the heck just happened. Then Ghadin would move on his way. Another idea; this guy builds and creates his own manor. It could show a hall in the manor that isn't complete, where it just drops off into the abyss. He moves over to it and raises his hand (claw, blades, hand), and a hall appears. In the next panel, it's fleshed out with a decorative flooring and some archways. Both ideas would remove the confusing pronouns, and would introduce one of the more important characters and locations. That's what I have in my head so far. Thanks for the support, guys, and please let me know if any of these sound good

Yeah, I might try another word, but I could end up with something even worse. But thanks, I appreciate it!

Thanks, I haven't been able to receive much help or critique until now, so I appreciate it.

Don't worry, you weren't sounding too harsh. And you do have a good point. I'm seeing that these characters and terms have been introduced at a bad time, so I'll introduce them better at a more convenient time, so I'm scrapping these pages since they seem a bit confusing for a new reader. However, I will read over your critique and apply it to the new pages, and if I make an error in applying it to the new pages, I'll fix it. Perhaps, if you didn't mind, I'll IM you, or someone else that is willing to help, the sketches of the new pages so if there's something I did wrong, I am told at a time that's easy to correct.

Ah, editing panels where they weren't intended to go won't work. And even if I did, there's not much I could have them say that would make sense with their poses, and there's little I could have them say, even if I started over, that wouldn't be confusing. I'll skip ahead to the next scene where things are more explained.

Ah, I hadn't known that. I'll take it, then. This was supposed to be a flashback to several years before the story began, but if it's confusing more than anything, I'll rewrite it so it's more relevant to the next scene and a bit more compressed. I'll see if I can't reuse some panels to save time, such as the top one at the beginning. Maybe reuse the first three panels and compress them into the first page, then redo the second and third page to create the new second.

Well, maybe instead of starting here where all the pronouns are being introduced, I could begin at a slightly later time in the story where one is explained when it's necessary. So, scrap the intro with all the mask guys and begin with the main character? Also, Spire, I might add that your critique is appreciated, but I would also appreciate it if you worded it a little more politely, if you please.

Sure, I'll keep those tips in mind, and thanks! I already have the two next pages started, so it might be a little while before I can start using the tips, though.

Hello, and welcome to the GCN!

I'm already getting some good imagery, I'll get started tomorrow.

It was worth the wait, I -love- it. Thank you so much! If you think of anything you want me to draw, let me know, and I'll get right on it.