Conker

Another warning: does the topic title anger you? Stop reading, and go do something else on this wonderful forum, thank you. So, I've reached the point where I'm just about, 100% fed up with any iteration of the Xbox beyond the original one, launched in 2002(that one, I will always love). Why is this, you're more than likely not asking? Well, it's simple, really! They're horribly manufactured pieces of shit. Oh, god, yes they are! I'm through with it, guys! Through with it! Honestly, I've had two 360s in my life, and my current one bit the dust with the fucking red rind of death, and twice is enough for me! Honestly, it truly, without a doubt, is my boiling point! First, a history lesson! My History With the Xbox 360: Believe it or not, it starts out happily: I want the system so bad, but I'm just a 12/13/ year old with no way to get it. I am hopeful I will get it for Christmas, so hopeful, but my parents tell me they did not get it. A real shame, I tell you. But then, on Christmas Eve(and per family tradition), we all go to my Grandparent's(mother's side) house, to open presents from family members which live in their area, and my Grandpa hands me a 360 game(Superman Returns, which I loved, so fuck the haters). I am perplexed, and confused, "But I don't have a 360, Grandpa. Thanks, though." and the response from him I got, got my young mind wondering what was in store for me, "Oh, Branden, you never know." I was pretty sure that I was going to get one at this point, from someone; Grandparents, parents, or other relatives. Who knows? Well, to my surprise, I did get one after all! Christmas day, I opened up what was(for that year), the biggest present under the tree, and there it was! That sexy, sexy box, and inside it was the console which I craved oh so much, and I had a game to play right away. I was so excited, I tell you what! I started out without Xbox Live for a good while, until I decided to make one, with my parents buying me a gold subscription, to boot; it was really cool, and a new experience for me, I tell you. I was enjoying Xbox Live, and started meeting cool people, some of which I became great friends with. But then, oh boy, it happened... I got my first red ring of death, and I was devastated! I could not play my 360 for the longest time, and my parents never got around to sending the thing in under warranty, too. I just had to deal with it, and so I did. I went almost a year or so, I believe, without my 360, until my brother got a new one, and gave me his old one as a hand-me-down. I was so happy! I had a new 360, and this one seemed to work flawlessly! I enjoyed it for a good while, playing tons of games I had originally missed out on. Eventually, I got around to playing The Amazing Spiderman(fun game from the SMALL bit of it I managed to play), and all was going well, until... out of fucking nowhere, red ring of death strikes me like flies on shit! Randomly, while playing the game... UGH! My hardware got fucked up, apparently, judging by reading up on my specific ring formation and power supply light color online. I have no warranty, and there's no way I am paying $99 - $120 to send it in for repairs; that's madness! Now, please read on to see why I am definitively done with the Xbox 360, if you wish? Why I'm Calling It Quits: In all honesty, I am done with the current generation lineup of the Xbox. I will only stick to my Original Xbox, which, is broken itself... BUT, through fault of my own! It was a damn resilient and strong, tank of a console, but I botched an HDD upgrade, so it's all my fault. Funny, huh? Every console I've ever owned that broke, has been through fault of my own, EXCEPT for my two 360s; that's just Microsoft's apparently new-found laziness in the field of console manufacturing showing itself, which is why the RRoD exists. Not only is it the red ring of death, but it's Microsoft themselves which ruin it for me: I have to pay a monthly fee just to play online with people, and(for example) fucking watch YouTube videos! Seriously!? YouTube is free, Microsoft, so I shouldn't have to pay a monthly fee just to use your goddamn YouTube application. Nobody should have to, for that matter. And let's not forget, boy let's not forget their recent butchering on the dashboard. What the fuck is this? Squares, with advertisements fucking everywhere? Seriously? Does it have a name? Oh yeah! It's that new operating system they're slapping onto everything they own now! Metro, I believe is the stupid name. I am being serious, guys: phones, tablets, websites, the 360, and even now Windows 8... all having Metro? How stupid is that? It's a UI consisting of colored squares, which is, to say the least, very dull, boring, and uninspired. When I had a working 360, I missed the good ol' days of the Blades dashboard; it was beautiful, and functioned perfectly as a console operating system! Eventually, it got updated with NXE, which, mind you, was still great(I loved it as much as Blades, maybe a bit more. maybe), then eventually... one more update, which changed NXE into some wierd knockoff of Sony's XMB UI(kind of), which, was okay... I guess? But boy, then after that, Metro came! Oh yeah, it came; forced, and intrusive, it invaded my 360, and I did not fucking appreciate that. At all. And let's not forget how horrible Xbox Live is as a whole(in my opinion), what with it's largely bad community and management. I can recall many stories and reports of people being banned/console banned from Xbox Live for practically fraudulent reasons! Were you banned? Well, better take it up with customer support-- oh, wait! Silly, didn't you know? Way more than half the time, Microsoft's support agents are too uneducated, stupid, and uninformed to do their own jobs and properly assist you, lol! It makes you wonder, though: whose dick in upper-management did they have to suck to get their position? Now, let's not forget the wonderful ability you receive to report anybody on Xbox Live! Hrm, did I play better than you? Shucks, better report me for hacking and/or cheating and exploiting glitches! But wait, I didn't hack, cheat or glitch? Well, it doesn't matter, seeing as how Microsoft will be diligent in handling these reports professionally and filtering out any fraudulent ones, right? Right? Nah, there may be one of the many incompetent employees handling the situation, and just taking action against you for shit you didn't do. It's apparently happened to many people, and it's pathetic. Anyways, where will I go from here, as far as consoles go? Where I Will Go From Here: Quite honestly, the last Microsoft console I'll own for a while, will be my Original Xbox which I will replace. Maybe, just maybe, I will get the Xbox 720/Durango, if it's not nearly as fucked up as the Xbox 360, maybe. All I know, is that I'm done with the 360, and the only thing that would make me get one again, is if I found one for an insanely cheap price somewhere(under $80), and that's the only reason I'd get another. I don't see that happening for a long fucking while, too. So long, 360. Now, you know what? From here on out, I'm a Sony and Nintendo guy, full and through. I've never, ever had any problems(nothing too extreme, at least, like with the 360) with consoles from these two companies, I don't think I ever will, honestly. I love my PS1, PS2, and PS Vita! I even love the PS3 I am going to eventually get(had one before, incredibly reliable)! I love my N64, NDS Lite, and my Nintendo Wii! And guess what? I sure as shit will love the Wii U, without a doubt. Oh, I also forgot to mention I will absolutely adore the PS4(hurr, that rhymed) whenever it rears its awesome ass into stores. Lord, I cannot wait! It's going to be good times for my gamer life, I tell you what. For the time being, I'm sticking with PSN, as it's FREE, even for online play. Plus, if you pay for PlayStation Plus(the premium service), you actually get plenty of actual, worth-while benefits, unlike with Xbox Live Gold. Most awesome being FREE AAA games. Yep, free fucking games. I'd love to see Microsoft do that with their premium plan, but they never will. I would like to apologize for the rant(lol, just kidding; I'm not fucking sorry), but I really needed to get out some steam. This has been bugging me a lot, and I'm just fucking done dealing with it. I am, like I said, through.

Have you seen that new pepperoni and meatball pizza? Daaaayumn, son! That looks delicious, and filling! -- Transmitted by an ancient satellite from across the cosmic web. Or my cellphone, if you prefer.

Well, we do have this: -- Transmitted by an ancient satellite from across the cosmic web. Or my cellphone, if you prefer.

Wrong board. This is for(as the board description says), your modifications to a game's code. This is not that. While it's cool, you could have at least tried to put it in its proper place. I am by no means trying to be a backseat moderator, just to clarify; merely trying to help you. -- Transmitted by an ancient satellite from across the cosmic web. Or my cellphone, if you prefer.

Nah, man, he can find a better way to do it. -- Transmitted by an ancient satellite from across the cosmic web. Or my cellphone, if you prefer.

Calm the hell down, will you? -- Transmitted by an ancient satellite from across the cosmic web. Or my cellphone, if you prefer.

I just discovered how to make a walking character. :3

http://www.yoyogames...amemaker/studio I'm sorry, what were you going on about again? Please, research next time. Also, it's free. You may want to keep that in mind. -- Transmitted by an ancient satellite from across the cosmic web. Or my cellphone, if you prefer.

So, I experimented with Game Maker Studio today, figuring I might as well since Steam made it easy for me to get. I figured out how to make a basic map, and like the other options I see so far. I may move PoV over to GM when I become familiar with it. -- Transmitted by an ancient satellite from across the cosmic web. Or my cellphone, if you prefer.

This. A million more times this. I don't know how to use Game Maker(since I never gave it a chance over RMXP, may go back one day), but I am certainly not going to fool myself into believing it's very limited. Game Maker, like RMXP, is a very powerful and seemingly limitless game creation software; they both have the potential to produce very quality work.

I've got my brother's old Nintendo DS Lite that he completely forgot existed, seeing as he's gone now and I can play it in the open without jogging his memory. I'm really putting my r4 to use now. -- Transmitted by an ancient satellite from across the cosmic web. Or my cellphone, if you prefer.

Pretty cool. 8D Sent from my EVO using Tapatalk 2

Feel free to share them. Just remember, stuff you've shot. :3

I guess I'm one of the only people here with a Vita? Or the only person here with a Vita that wants to share screenshots?

The way your neck joins with your head in that picture highly resembles a... uh, nevermind. Nice picture. O: San: Nice picture. :3

You know, on adult swim? It looks great to me, and they're even staying true to it(they have an old version of Tom, too, rather than the dumb and generic Tom 4 we got before the end of the first Toonami), so that's great. I have yet to find time to watch it on a Saturday night, what with my brother using the damn living room as his bedroom, but he's leaving for boot camp on October 1st, so I may be able to. Anyways, again, is anybody enjoying its return? Sent from my EVO using Tapatalk 2

He already did it. Truly an amazing thing for a blind person to do. Sent from my EVO using Tapatalk 2

Seriously, just watch:

Way to stick it to the man.

They made Conker into what it is because people were complaining/or whatever that it would just be another cutesy platformer, so then they went full-on mature with it. That's why they did it.

Okay, now where's my grilled cheese?

Uhm, food is meant to be however you make it. There isn't one specific way to eat food, not by a long shot.

Welcome back.

I see some cool stuff in this. Thank you!

*cough* Floppy disk *cough* It doesn't have to be on a cartridge.