The Oregon Trail: Starring the URA Team

[Gump]

The Oregon Trail

Starring: To Coool, Naxylldritt, Sakura, Shadowfire (known as Hunter) and Zeth!

"A testament to the strength of human will... And snake bites."

~ Some random guy we found

Story: One day, To Coool decided to play the Oregon Trail Deluxe, an old DOS game from 1992. In his latest emulation, he decided to make the cast the URA team, to see how well they would survive. They, uh... They did well... I guess.

Part One: The Beginning

As a result of unfortunate events, Sakura was among the first to get injured. She sadly gotten bit by a snake. However, the URA Team pressed on, and Sakura's wounds became no problem.

In only a short amount of time after that, Zeth, Hunter, and Naxylldritt all became diseased. Zeth got typhoid fever and Hunter got the measles. And Naxy, of course, had to get Cholera. Nice job, guys. Oh well, at least To Coool is still medically fine.

In the next few days, Zeth was cured of typhoid fever by To Coool, the doctor. However, Sakura got the disease, and passed it on to Zeth yet again. Thanks Sakura, you just put a burden on To Coool yet again.

For awhile, everything was going great. Until Zeth got bit by a snake. Haha, that rhymed. Oh well, it seems people in this group like getting injured and diseased. Except for To Coool, at least.

Time went on and on, and eventually, Naxylldritt got lost. How swell. Stop hunting leprechauns, Naxy. They don't really have gold. >.>

Why does everyone like getting bit by snakes? I tell you, this crowd is nuts. Yet again, To Coool must cure everyone of their wounds.



Part 2: The Part That Comes After The First

Not only are people in the group getting sick, so are the oxen. Doesn't matter, To Coool has another 9 waiting for a job. Your death did not matter, and you fed us well, ox.

You see, Sakura really likes snakes. So much that she doesn't care that she gets bit. She found one she thought was cool, and showed to to Naxy. They both got bit. Yet again, Dr. Coool must cure them of venomous bites.

Naxylldritt, while hunting leprechauns, broke his leg... Wait seriously? Naxylldritt broke his leg? How the hell is he suppose to hunt for us now? Does the Doctor have to hunt now? WHAT USE ARE YOU NAXYLLDRITT?! Naxylldritt a freakin' freeloader... And Sakura, for Pete's sake, stop screwin' with snakes. They always bit you.

September was a rather uneventful month, but what else is new? Another person got bit by a snake (surprisingly, it was Hunter and not Sakura) and an ox died.



Part 3: That Part When You Thinks Everything's Good But It Isn't.

http://i.imgur.com/jXhJ1.png

Literally less than 1 second away from the final destination in The Oregon Trail, Sakura dies. Yep, she dies. Dead. Gone. Forever. Surprisingly, even after getting bit by snakes all the damn time, she died of exhaustion, after sleeping a straight 5 days.
To Coool dug the grave. Naxylldritt is crying over it after miracuously unbreaking his legs, and Zeth and Hunter are hugging eachother in the background.

"Why is common sense written on the grave?" Naxylldritt asks To Coool.
"Oh, because Sakura lacked common sense. She didn't understand that snakes biting her was a bad thing," To Coool responded.
"You evil bastard," Naxylldritt says.
" ," To Coool responds with.

http://i.imgur.com/QW6EB.png

The four friends eventually reached their destination without Sakura, who died only a few feet outside the town. They all started new lives. Zeth and Hunter decided to get married, but both got dysentary and got bit by snakes. They died a few days later. Naxylldritt continued to hunt leprechauns, but eventually they took Naxylldritt away to do awful things to him. Naxylldritt hasn't been seen since. To Coool never got hurt or diseased, and continues to work as a doctor and cure people of disease.

http://i.imgur.com/bHQa6.png

To Coool scored pretty well. He beats everyone.


THE END

Author's Note: I did not start a game of The Oregon Trail to intentionally cause this thread. But after seeing Sakura get bit, I decided to take screenshots of every bad thing to happen. It turned into this thread, full of fail by everyone in the wagon EXCEPT me. I don't understand why Sakura loved snakes so much, but she did. And I'm serious; she died less than one second away from me beating the game with no deaths. I blame her for being weak. D:

Anyways, thanks for reading!

[Shadow Fire]

I lol'd... so hard.

[Zeth Ryder]

My sides they hurt from laughter! XD